if you are reading this it's time to say hello

after the foliage-text
parts, after the falling
waters and partly
digested dream
sequence, what
is left lives out
another fantasy:
living

my possession-poems
have poisoned me,
their potential spoiled
by jealousy

wishes
splish-splash
on the page,
taking their toll:
how droll

if you are reading this
perhaps you've kept up,
as the visceral sediments
of my existence keep
building up

if you look my way
i pray it's when i'm smiling

well-spring
of tender offerings,
i put myself on the square

no matter how i tilt 
the text it's not enough
to make you care

ain't it time to give up rhyme?
clearly i don't agree

my methods are lacking,
my meter atrocious,
this collection embarrassing,
this season inglorious
                         
if you are reading this now
it's the last bit of me breaking
the surface tension

it's the hundredth time
diving to find a moss-sopped
way of saying
do you love me yet

it's the spinning shadow
of a music-box playing
only the necessary notes

do you take all this
as necessary?

i am eager to buy it,
but not necessarily

this is the way our year ends

you who i feel so close to me
even farther away than before