squishing the thing

on a hot windy walk

home nearly half a day

passed since my rise

ripping out my nosehairs

like plucking petals

she loves me

she loves me snot

wet gunk in the eyes

and pads of sweat

beneath the arms 

the lip swamps

in the shoes 

how good it was 

to see you 

spells/smells

trouble

but i'm managing

decking the tip

of my tongue 

with words of

resignation

decking 

my claustrophobia

with desire

for the great

sweaty outdoors

until that is a fly

or at least

a fearless relative

of the fly

followed me 

for too long

and because it

bothered me

this being the only

thing that bothers me

within my control

i went to squish it

but missed it

but fuck i wanted

to kill that fly

wanted to flush

that experience

down the cosmic

drain wanted just

one clear victory

over all 

that buzzes
or stings